3 Months

Three months ago we saw her face for the very first time.

I still remember that phone call. I remember how bad my hands were shaking trying to write down information. I still have that scrap of paper, details scribbled in red ink, complete with misspelled name (hey, D and Z sound the same over the phone sometimes!). I still remember Sarah saying, "We have a file we'd like you to look at and tell us if you think she's your daughter." I remember driving home feeling surprisingly calm and thinking I might just wait to open the email with her information until after Kevin got home. I changed my mind, but did manage to say a little prayer before opening it to ask that if she was our daughter, that I might know.

I've already written in detail about that day, but sometimes I have to remind myself to think of how happy we were during this often frustrating wait. We weren't expecting a referral for several months, and certainly not less than a month after our paperwork was logged in. We hoped to have good news by Thanksgiving, or at least Christmas. "How wonderful," we discussed, "to have a referral before the end of the year. To be able to show pictures of our new daughter to our family around the tree." I should be grateful that we are this far along when so many people are still waiting to get to where we are now, and I am. Sometimes I just have to remind myself to stop and think about all the miracles that have happened so far rather than getting caught up in wishing for another one.

Babies in China are called Baobao, meaning "little treasure" and she certainly is that. One we feel honored to receive. Our LOA will come when the time is right, and in the meantime I plan on spending the day filled with gratitude to be able to use the words "my daughter".

我 的 宝宝， 我们 都 爱 你。